Many Such Takes: Quarter Zips, Birth Trauma, IVF Babies, Wasting Her Time, Ugly Friends
The most unhinged discourse of the week, always free
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Birth Trauma
Not the funniest topic of the week, but it caused drama, so we have to talk about it. A Twitter user started discourse when she said this:
I believe this all started when a different user posted about her traumatic C-section (in which she almost lost the baby, although ultimately they both survived- still very traumatic!) and that woman got heat for “scaring” young women about childbirth. Her response was that it was perfectly acceptable to share all childbirth experiences, including negative ones. I’m not sure if this tweet was a direct response to her, but I do think that’s where the conversation originated.
Anyway, the moms of Twitter weren’t happy about this one, and it’s rare that all of us come together to agree on something.
Quarter Zips
There was a bit of a kerfuffle between a viral Twitter post about men’s 1/4 zip sweaters being the equivalent of a “sun dress” for women (ie: the sexiest thing they can wear.) While many women agreed, many didn’t, and the suggestion was shot down immediately by famed fashion expert, Menswear Guy:
Naturally, I was all-in on this drama because I wrote the guide for How Men Can Dress Sexy, and although I didn’t have a section dedicated to quarter zip sweaters, I did recommend them as a way to dress up an otherwise casual outfit. I agree with the below user, basically, although I usually love Menswear Guy.
Look, I’m not saying 1/4 zip sweaters literally arouse women, but when you think about how most men dress (not well!) it’s certainly an improvement. Granted, it requires some appreciation of the preppy look, and I might also be biased because my husband was wearing one the night we met (granted it was for a costume, and the costume was “preppy guy” so make of that what you will.)
Several women suggested henleys as an alternative, which funny enough, were explicitly mentioned my fashion guide.
My only explanation here is that 1/4 zip sweaters are deeply “finance coded,” which appeals specifically to right of center women, and less to leftist women. Like a true liberal, I think they’re basically just fine, and can look good sometimes. Finally, true enlightened centrism.
IVF Babies
Obviously, as the mom of two IVF babies I’m a little biased, but I had to include this tweet today:
Some good responses:
I had to include my own! This is my newsletter after all!!!
Wasting Her Time
What a surprise, another piece of content that reminds me of my most popular article, The Men Who Sabotage Women’s Fertility. This week, an improv actress (who was unfortunately not acting) posted a video detailing the story of her recent breakup: she had been with her boyfriend for three years in LA, everything was going great, he asked to move to Texas together to be closer to his dad, she quit her job and spent all her money on moving to Texas, buying and building furniture, and then as soon as they got to Texas he dumped her because they were “incompatible.” VIA A HANDWRITTEN NOTE!!!
Obviously, this is one of my hot topics, so I raged on her behalf, pointing out that most of the people who would blame her for not putting her foot down and forcing a proposal before investing her life into this guy would have also considered her demanding and self-centered if she had required some kind of timeline for a proposal before giving up her career and savings for him.
I love that this person’s takeaway was that we need to do something about moving expenses.
Ugly Friends
This week, we were blessed with this absolute chef’s kiss tweet, which has been deleted (and since the OP obviously doesn’t want to be associated with it anymore, I’ve censored the username:)
This tweet is just so perfect. She’s not wrong, I mean, people are definitely meaner to ugly people than hot people. But using this observation as a way to subtly imply you’re hot is just peak Main Character. It gets at a dynamic I’ve noticed on Twitter for a while, which is that people who are fairly concerned with privilege and lack thereof (and I don’t know if this particular person falls into that category, I’m speaking generally) will find any excuse to consider themselves marginalized, but the one area where they are seemingly comfortable admitting privilege is the area of “pretty privilege.” Nobody wants to be like, “yeah, I’m oppressed because I’m a big uggo.”
I recall one user a while back (who shall remain nameless, I don’t know if she’s even still on Twitter) who checked almost every box on the oppression checklist, except for one, which was ugliness, and her whole thing was talking about being oppressed in all these various ways, except for how hot she was, which she also felt was a source of oppression on some level (girls were jealous of her, guys were always hitting on her, nobody took her seriously, what have you.)
So anyway, while I’d agree pretty privilege is a thing, the main people we see yapping about this topic on Twitter are the people who want to use it as a humblebrag opportunity. I promise: just post a selfie and say you looked hot! People are fine with that!
However, as “annoying” as this tweet was, it was actually great, because it sparked some top-tier responses:
This is my favorite one:
And this one ties everything together nicely.
Other Highlights
Trump used a rally as an opportunity to muse about the size of Arnold Palmer’s dick, using absolutely impeccable comedic timing.
The following tweet unintentionally brought up some Twitter-trauma for many parents who, several months ago, talked about wanting more child-friendly amenities at a library and were screamed at by librarians for being lazy:
This tweet has me cackling:
Can someone, hopefully a woman, explain to me why henleys are attractive? I'm an extremely mid guy and I own a couple henleys, but in my mind they have always been just, like, shirts. Until now I had never even considered the possibility they might enhance my looks. They are just normal-ass shirts with a couple mostly extraneous buttons! Should I wear one on a first date??
I was thinking about the improv lady that got broken up with. On reading your forever girlfriend post, I was wondering what are realistic boundaries to have when you've been waiting on a ring. Should you refuse to move in at all? Should you draw the line at combined finances? The discourse around this post made me realize the boundary is just whatever you/your partner consider "wife things". If you're not yet a wife, don't do wife things and then later be mad they aren't respected as wife things. Those are the boundaries you'll be able to hold in your mind easily than someone else's boundaries that are unrealistic for you.