You're Too Rich to Shoplift
Most shoplifters aren't struggling single mothers stealing baby formula--they're upper middle class people seeking the thrill of free charcuterie.
Stealing from Whole Foods is so hot right now. The latest Whole Foods stealing content comes from content creators Hasan Piker and Jia Tolentino, as interviewed by The New York Times (TLDR: Piker encourages all forms of theft, aka “micro-looting” as a form of anti-capitalist rebellion, although says he’s personally too scared to do it, and Tolentino brags about stealing from Whole Foods herself on several occasions.)
This conversation comes off the heels of another article about Whole Foods jail, which covered the trials and tribulations of Whole Foods criminals. A separate article entitled I Love Stealing From Whole Foods by someone under the nom de plume “Butt Town,” describes the thrill of shoplifting but at least has the decency to encourage Whole Foods thieves to play Robin Hood and give their swiped sushi counter unagi rolls and organic ginger kombucha to “the unhoused.”
While Piker and Tolentino encourage many forms of crime as a form of anti-capitalist rebellion in their interview (mostly stealing, but also the occasional assassination or pipeline bomb, if “justified”) Whole Foods shoplifting seems to be the main theme. And whenever this topic comes up, and some crazy radical says “stealing is bad,” they invariably get called a Karen, fascist or bootlicker, accused of believing shoplifting is worse than murder and genocide, and then accused of trying to prosecute some variation of “single mother on food stamps stealing baby formula.” And, sure, I’ll be honest—as anti-crime as I may be, I would look the other way if a poor person stole something from a large corporation for the purpose of feeding their family. There is a reason we are meant to be on the side of Jean Valjean while watching Les Miserables.
There’s just one problem—most of the time, that is not the profile of a shoplifter. In fact, shoplifting is a crime predominantly committed by educated middle and upper middle class people looking for a cheap thrill, and using the guise of anti-capitalism to justify their pilfered Prosecco.
