The Men Yearn for the Alpha Female

A "high value" woman isn't what they say

This week on Twitter (where else) I saw this image of what I imagine was the most bizarre Zazzle custom bookmark anyone has ever ordered:

I find it interesting that the ideal woman—high value woman, in other words, as described by a man—is polite, shy and “soft,” whatever that means. Come on, who doesn’t want to fuck a squishmallow?

Pillowy lovemaking aside, I get what they’re saying, but they’re wrong. That’s not to say the most romantically successful women are masculine or domineering either—these guys are deliberately ignoring a secret third thing.

As I’ve written about before, I had a fairly in-depth phase in the red pill universe in the mid-2010s (I was never a red pill content creator, I only lurked.) Red pill writers (almost entirely men) will caution men against following women’s advice on attracting women. They’ll say that you shouldn’t ask a fish how to be caught—you should ask the fisherman. They also say you should pay attention to what women do (revealed preferences) instead of what they say.

I actually kind of agree with that. Especially at that point in time, dating advice for men, as written by women, was basically “Be nice and respectful.” (It’s certainly not bad to be nice and respectful, but it also doesn’t have much to do with inspiring lust.) But I find it funny that these same guys who have great clarity about the ineffectiveness of dating advice given by the desired gender often go full Tumblr SJW Lived Experience when confronted with a woman talking about male sexual preferences—suddenly, the “don’t ask the fish how to be caught” philosophy goes out the window, and women should sit their asses down in male spaces and listen to male bodies and voices. Suddenly, when the genders are flipped, you should ask the fish how to be caught. And the fish are claiming that the best way to lure them is to be “shy and polite.”

The fish are lying.