The "just you wait" people are so annoying. Maybe it'll go the way you think, but maybe it won't. Why ruin the present moment with predictions about the future that might not even be so bad if they pan out? Like sure, my 4yo doesn't eat anything I put in her lunchbox, but she also watches movies with me now and can be trusted on the big slide by herself, so it isn't somehow worse?
That reminds me of the old chestnut (not used anymore in these days of more equal parenting) - “Just you wait until your father gets home!” (And then half the time Dad didn’t want to be bothered with matters of discipline, he just wanted his martini and La Z Boy recliner.)
Who knows what the kid’s eating habits will be five years from now. I wager that at least some of those kids will be eating a wider variety of food simply because they are in school and want to be like their friends, and don’t want to be laughed at, so they’ll suck it up and try the broccoli or garbanzos or whatever. (Worked for me! As a kid, not a mom.)
"Non-melanated POC" is just how they say they think East Asian people are basically white. They're paper bag testing at the door of their anti-racist book store.
"feeding therapists" . . . wow, added to my list of professions I had no idea existed, or needed to. Being a very old person, back in the olden days, we had kids who were picky eaters . . . but we found that when they got hungry, they ate. Not one ever starved to death.
I really struggle to understand this fixation with "third places". It seems that at some indeterminate point in the past, the world was in a golden age of free, queer-friendly places to meet up that were taken away by capitalism. Was it and I just didn't see them?
There are just fewer places where you can hang out without having to spend a lot of money. Especially a city like NYC when it's not good weather to be in central park. There used to be more places where you could be a regular, and there were other regulars, and you knew them and made friends with them, became a small little community. This worked great if there was an owner who spent a lot of time in the place talking to customers and was the nodal point for all the customers. I've experienced that type of cafe in many parts of the world, including right outside my school. There was always an everything-shop that had limited square footage, but carried everything a student could need from candy to world maps, and there was always a chatty lady behind the counter. All the cool kids would hang out on the sidewalk there and the proprietress was part of their gang in a way. Her friendliness meant they'd stay there longer and keep ordering stuff and her place seemed popular and aspirational.
You can't quite do that now in the US. Lots of places are closing. They also aren't owner-operated to the same extent as before. It's hard to trust your customers and it seems like a mistake to be friendly with them. So there's fewer places where you can just hang out and hope to get in on a scene and make friends.
Maybe it's because I don't live in New York, but I am 43 years old and I just don't recall ever living through this supposed golden age of third places that is now gone. I remember you always had to buy something to sit in a cafe. And most cafes don't expect you to buy much. Spend like $5 and you're good for hours. You don't have to spend "a lot" of money. If I don't want to pay, I can meet someone in a park or a library - I have no more difficulty finding these places than I did in the 90s.
A lot of what you're describing sounds less like places existing and more like people collectively choosing not to use spaces that exist in the same way. And you don't solve a problem like that with nostalgia.
In a lot of major cities, they removed seating from starbucks so you just walk in, get your coffee and gtfo. This is especially the case in high-traffic areas because they otherwise get homeless people refusing to leave and scaring off other customers. They don't have bathrooms for customer use in a lot of places as well because they got too many people overdosing in their bathrooms, or destroying the place. I used to hang out at the library a lot until it became full of junkies.
I remember a Friday evening in San Francisco after work when someone asked me if I was going to the Mission. I said "nah, im going back home, there's nothing to do in the Mission but eat and drink". There's few places where you can just feel like being, in one of the biggest cities in the US, that's definitely a problem. Like, even the mall would close at 8:30 and everything before that would feel like you had no business being there unless you were buying stuff and everything was too expensive for casual shopping.
What else am I supposed to be doing, I'd wonder. I got my answer in San Jose, 50 miles away on a Friday night. Everywhere is full of young entry-level workers dressed up. There are cheap shows to watch, cheap emo nites to hang out in and meet people, and nerd events that are open to the public. You can go barhopping, there are enough bars that feel lively and are open late. There are food trucks that don't cost a bomb, and you can stand around eating and giggling on the sidewalk. There's even a couple of nightclubs.
What's the difference? It caters to normies, and prioritizes normies over being too for/against junkies. They aren't having hostile architecture that penalizes junkies, but at the same time no one is catering to them either and business owners turn out people ruining the mood. And there's a critical mass of people enjoying themselves and there's sidewalk life.
If I try doing the same thing in San Francisco, things feel much more insular. More expensive to get into the nightclub. Restaurants cost a bomb, or feel trashy. And when you're in, the waitstaff is hostile and the places shut early. Often, there's just no one there. In San Jose, There's parking nearby and you don't feel like you're going to be mugged to/from your car. It's easy to go out and hang out and talk to strangers, easy to organize stuff.
So this third places thing is something very real.
Yeah you can still meet your fellow niche folk. Have a meet up at one of your places, the library, a brewery, the park. I run into gay cycling groups when I'm just biking on the trail near me. Although, this also requires you to actively go out and touch some grass so ...
Yeah, I honestly suspect that a lot of this complaining is driven by people with severe social anxiety who are looking for some external force they can blame for their lack of a social life.
Why do people insist on spelling folks “folx?” It’s the same pronunciation! Is one extra letter too much to type?
Also this is why we can’t have nice worker owned cooperative things. Worker owned cooperatives tear one another to bits over trifles, although, it seems that this particular WOC was rather sneakily imposed in order to avoid paying debts.
I wish I could say “You made that shit up”, but it really is the end times. On the plus side, I am sure the new NYC mayor will get that bookstore squared away.
Literally so many parks, libraries, and other bookstores exist in every big city including NYC. Are these ppl really claiming there is no other library/book site or coffee shops to hang out in?
The therapist with the kpop fan account is definitely something.
Reminded me that I recently had to explain to my therapist what a vtuber is, and as awkward as it was, I'd have been a lot more concerned if I *didn't* have to explain it.
Human generated video content is of questionable value to begin with. A.I. generated video content takes human generated content and filters every possible ingredient of value out of it until you are left with the pure synthetic dregs. Really, what are we doing here?
I am horrified with "Dr Trump" telling people to split up the MMR when it can't be done, and not to take Tylenol at all, which will have the unfortunate effect of a woman running a high fever and refusing to take it, risking the health of her unborn child. But I did see two people repeating the same 'story' of a pregnant woman in the hospital with liver failure (I think) due to a Tylenol overdose. Amazing how that happened so quickly! You know this is going to lead to an ex husband suing his ex wife if their child have autism, claiming she took Tylenol.
This mixes a couple of categories and causes confusion: "[Tylenol as an] OTC PAIN reliever considered safe in pregnancy (category B) and the FDA warns that the danger of an untreated FEVER could be more detrimental than Tylenol used to treat it." Are we talking fever reduction or pain relief? Tylenol works pretty well for fever, although many other meds do just as well; however, most people do not find Tylenol works much if at all for pain . . . other than as a placebo.
The "just you wait" people are so annoying. Maybe it'll go the way you think, but maybe it won't. Why ruin the present moment with predictions about the future that might not even be so bad if they pan out? Like sure, my 4yo doesn't eat anything I put in her lunchbox, but she also watches movies with me now and can be trusted on the big slide by herself, so it isn't somehow worse?
That reminds me of the old chestnut (not used anymore in these days of more equal parenting) - “Just you wait until your father gets home!” (And then half the time Dad didn’t want to be bothered with matters of discipline, he just wanted his martini and La Z Boy recliner.)
Who knows what the kid’s eating habits will be five years from now. I wager that at least some of those kids will be eating a wider variety of food simply because they are in school and want to be like their friends, and don’t want to be laughed at, so they’ll suck it up and try the broccoli or garbanzos or whatever. (Worked for me! As a kid, not a mom.)
[tom hanks on a boat meme]
Look at me. I'm the bookstore ownxr now.
"Non-melanated POC" is just how they say they think East Asian people are basically white. They're paper bag testing at the door of their anti-racist book store.
"feeding therapists" . . . wow, added to my list of professions I had no idea existed, or needed to. Being a very old person, back in the olden days, we had kids who were picky eaters . . . but we found that when they got hungry, they ate. Not one ever starved to death.
Honestly, they were a huge waste of money
remarkably, there's another case of leftist bookstore drama in london this year
https://www.the-londoner.co.uk/scarlett-letters-closure-left-wing-bookshop/
I really struggle to understand this fixation with "third places". It seems that at some indeterminate point in the past, the world was in a golden age of free, queer-friendly places to meet up that were taken away by capitalism. Was it and I just didn't see them?
There are just fewer places where you can hang out without having to spend a lot of money. Especially a city like NYC when it's not good weather to be in central park. There used to be more places where you could be a regular, and there were other regulars, and you knew them and made friends with them, became a small little community. This worked great if there was an owner who spent a lot of time in the place talking to customers and was the nodal point for all the customers. I've experienced that type of cafe in many parts of the world, including right outside my school. There was always an everything-shop that had limited square footage, but carried everything a student could need from candy to world maps, and there was always a chatty lady behind the counter. All the cool kids would hang out on the sidewalk there and the proprietress was part of their gang in a way. Her friendliness meant they'd stay there longer and keep ordering stuff and her place seemed popular and aspirational.
You can't quite do that now in the US. Lots of places are closing. They also aren't owner-operated to the same extent as before. It's hard to trust your customers and it seems like a mistake to be friendly with them. So there's fewer places where you can just hang out and hope to get in on a scene and make friends.
Maybe it's because I don't live in New York, but I am 43 years old and I just don't recall ever living through this supposed golden age of third places that is now gone. I remember you always had to buy something to sit in a cafe. And most cafes don't expect you to buy much. Spend like $5 and you're good for hours. You don't have to spend "a lot" of money. If I don't want to pay, I can meet someone in a park or a library - I have no more difficulty finding these places than I did in the 90s.
A lot of what you're describing sounds less like places existing and more like people collectively choosing not to use spaces that exist in the same way. And you don't solve a problem like that with nostalgia.
In a lot of major cities, they removed seating from starbucks so you just walk in, get your coffee and gtfo. This is especially the case in high-traffic areas because they otherwise get homeless people refusing to leave and scaring off other customers. They don't have bathrooms for customer use in a lot of places as well because they got too many people overdosing in their bathrooms, or destroying the place. I used to hang out at the library a lot until it became full of junkies.
I remember a Friday evening in San Francisco after work when someone asked me if I was going to the Mission. I said "nah, im going back home, there's nothing to do in the Mission but eat and drink". There's few places where you can just feel like being, in one of the biggest cities in the US, that's definitely a problem. Like, even the mall would close at 8:30 and everything before that would feel like you had no business being there unless you were buying stuff and everything was too expensive for casual shopping.
What else am I supposed to be doing, I'd wonder. I got my answer in San Jose, 50 miles away on a Friday night. Everywhere is full of young entry-level workers dressed up. There are cheap shows to watch, cheap emo nites to hang out in and meet people, and nerd events that are open to the public. You can go barhopping, there are enough bars that feel lively and are open late. There are food trucks that don't cost a bomb, and you can stand around eating and giggling on the sidewalk. There's even a couple of nightclubs.
What's the difference? It caters to normies, and prioritizes normies over being too for/against junkies. They aren't having hostile architecture that penalizes junkies, but at the same time no one is catering to them either and business owners turn out people ruining the mood. And there's a critical mass of people enjoying themselves and there's sidewalk life.
If I try doing the same thing in San Francisco, things feel much more insular. More expensive to get into the nightclub. Restaurants cost a bomb, or feel trashy. And when you're in, the waitstaff is hostile and the places shut early. Often, there's just no one there. In San Jose, There's parking nearby and you don't feel like you're going to be mugged to/from your car. It's easy to go out and hang out and talk to strangers, easy to organize stuff.
So this third places thing is something very real.
The new generation is mad they missed hanging out in front of the Sam Goody at the mall
Yeah you can still meet your fellow niche folk. Have a meet up at one of your places, the library, a brewery, the park. I run into gay cycling groups when I'm just biking on the trail near me. Although, this also requires you to actively go out and touch some grass so ...
Yeah, I honestly suspect that a lot of this complaining is driven by people with severe social anxiety who are looking for some external force they can blame for their lack of a social life.
Why do people insist on spelling folks “folx?” It’s the same pronunciation! Is one extra letter too much to type?
Also this is why we can’t have nice worker owned cooperative things. Worker owned cooperatives tear one another to bits over trifles, although, it seems that this particular WOC was rather sneakily imposed in order to avoid paying debts.
I wish I could say “You made that shit up”, but it really is the end times. On the plus side, I am sure the new NYC mayor will get that bookstore squared away.
Literally so many parks, libraries, and other bookstores exist in every big city including NYC. Are these ppl really claiming there is no other library/book site or coffee shops to hang out in?
The therapist with the kpop fan account is definitely something.
Reminded me that I recently had to explain to my therapist what a vtuber is, and as awkward as it was, I'd have been a lot more concerned if I *didn't* have to explain it.
Human generated video content is of questionable value to begin with. A.I. generated video content takes human generated content and filters every possible ingredient of value out of it until you are left with the pure synthetic dregs. Really, what are we doing here?
Regarding Bluestockings, I never heard of them before, but any NYC retail storefront that lasts 26 years has to be doing something right.
I am horrified with "Dr Trump" telling people to split up the MMR when it can't be done, and not to take Tylenol at all, which will have the unfortunate effect of a woman running a high fever and refusing to take it, risking the health of her unborn child. But I did see two people repeating the same 'story' of a pregnant woman in the hospital with liver failure (I think) due to a Tylenol overdose. Amazing how that happened so quickly! You know this is going to lead to an ex husband suing his ex wife if their child have autism, claiming she took Tylenol.
This mixes a couple of categories and causes confusion: "[Tylenol as an] OTC PAIN reliever considered safe in pregnancy (category B) and the FDA warns that the danger of an untreated FEVER could be more detrimental than Tylenol used to treat it." Are we talking fever reduction or pain relief? Tylenol works pretty well for fever, although many other meds do just as well; however, most people do not find Tylenol works much if at all for pain . . . other than as a placebo.