16 Comments
User's avatar
Kelly's avatar

The emails that went out on our sorority list serve circa 2011 make this text look like a hug from your mom (if your mom was telling you to eat box).

Expand full comment
Golden God's avatar

There was a (in)famous leaked email from ~15 years ago. A sorority leader was absolutely laying into her sisters for not being fun and approachable during mixers with the frats. It was profane, crazy, and hilarious.

Expand full comment
Kelly's avatar

Reading that was like a good chat with an ex. Horrible and nostalgic at the same time 😆

Expand full comment
Sam Tobin-Hochstadt's avatar

You can't just leave us hanging like this ...

Expand full comment
Kelly's avatar

Imagine the cunt punt email but about showing up for the PB&J fundraiser with the PiKE boys.

Expand full comment
Ameya A's avatar

There are two kinds of brotherhoods: the individual fraternities/sororities themselves, and the brotherhood of Presidents of those organizations. I served back in the email days, so there is a listserv archive full of emails like this from me. The one I am proudest of demanded that everyone come to that week's chapter meeting, then listed all of the problem sets and exams I had that week, then closed, "if you tell me you have too much work to come to the house meeting, make sure to have a change of clothes, because I will laugh in your face until I puke."

Expand full comment
James's avatar
2hEdited

It’s weird to me people reply to tweets or to replies to tweets at all anymore. Like, what are we expecting to accomplish by telling off the “who’s watching the kids” gal? Might as well be talking to the naked man on the train platform. There are deeper issues and you’re not going to solve them here.

Expand full comment
Cartoons Hate Her's avatar

Yes! I am fascinated by the personality type of the person who does stuff like this. Who is this for? is it for virtual high fives? what is going on

Expand full comment
Joe's avatar
4mEdited

I think it tickles the part of the brain that wants to have a responsive conversation, but doesn't know that it's responding to bots who look like people and people who look like bots.

Expand full comment
Scott A's avatar

Nofap starts Monday

Expand full comment
Jonathan Rabinowitz's avatar

I showed the FDR one to my cat and we both laughed!

Expand full comment
The Cultural Romantic's avatar

More cunnilingus is actually a good thing. Good for the men!

Expand full comment
ProfessorChessDad's avatar

I would certainly hope these guys are going down on their ladies without having to be asked, or without being TOLD to by another dude, how weird. That's just common decency. And why would they not want to?

Expand full comment
Cartoons Hate Her's avatar

Assuming these are random hookups I kinda get why they wouldn’t want to lol

Expand full comment
David Roberts's avatar

In one of Sherlock Holmes' most famous stories, the clue was the dog didn't bark in the night. We live in an age where the dog always barks.

Expand full comment
Sharty's avatar

I am irrationally--or entirely rationally--incensed by a plot that has a y-axis range of 0 to 100 with no additional context.

BAD PLOT

Expand full comment