FWIW you sound SO similar to me as a child (I was also adored by adults who found me quirky and hilarious but generally disliked by other kids) and both my kids are autistic. I have never been assessed myself but even before having kids I had my suspicions...
Thank you for unlocking this. You are one of the most unique voices on this platform, not to mention one of the most level headed - great to peak behind the curtain of CHH a little.
(I've really appreciated the focus as someone in this demographic lol. It's interesting to me how much more acute your childhood stories seem. Not sure what it is [imagine partly gender] but I basically coasted into fitting in with any group of misfits.)
I'm curious as to your take (maybe already written on) about the "stickiness" of these sorts of experiences. It seems to me (as someone improving at 30) that being hurt by childhood dynamics is really obvious in like, the politics of a lot of young adults (ofc huge sample bias by being too online). I feel like we sort of oscillate in the culture between (rugged self hat) thinking that this is pathetic and (freudian determinist hat) thinking that it's inescapable.
If the cheat code for women is being hot, the cheat code for men is having a good career. If you make an upper middle class income and aren’t abusive or hideously fat, you’ll find someone plausible. They may have more baggage than you, especially if you are a late bloomer, but lonely people shouldn’t be too picky.
Good read. I sympathize with this a lot. Luckily I was never really bullied (at least to my face) for the most part, but I was definitely ignored & somewhat of an outcast. Luckily I did have friends growing up, but even in the friend groups I was in I was sorta “at the bottom” or just not as close as the others were to each other.
Now approaching 30 I still notice the same things. Personality like that is incredibly hard to change. But I’ve mostly accepted that it’s just who I am. I’m lucky to have a long term girlfriend of over a decade (we’re getting married when she’s done with her residency!), but we’re in a sorta semi-distance situation and I feel like late 20s & early 30s is a hard age to make friends (people already have their groups, they’re focused on marriage, kids, etc). It also doesn’t help that I moved recently. 😅
FWIW you sound SO similar to me as a child (I was also adored by adults who found me quirky and hilarious but generally disliked by other kids) and both my kids are autistic. I have never been assessed myself but even before having kids I had my suspicions...
FYI CHH—Paywall is still there, it looks like!
Wow, weird! Just fixed it!
Thank you for unlocking this. You are one of the most unique voices on this platform, not to mention one of the most level headed - great to peak behind the curtain of CHH a little.
Volcanica still rocks ngl
(I've really appreciated the focus as someone in this demographic lol. It's interesting to me how much more acute your childhood stories seem. Not sure what it is [imagine partly gender] but I basically coasted into fitting in with any group of misfits.)
I'm curious as to your take (maybe already written on) about the "stickiness" of these sorts of experiences. It seems to me (as someone improving at 30) that being hurt by childhood dynamics is really obvious in like, the politics of a lot of young adults (ofc huge sample bias by being too online). I feel like we sort of oscillate in the culture between (rugged self hat) thinking that this is pathetic and (freudian determinist hat) thinking that it's inescapable.
I prefer reality. The figure on (my) right appears to be massively fake. And sorta creepy.
All my best
If the cheat code for women is being hot, the cheat code for men is having a good career. If you make an upper middle class income and aren’t abusive or hideously fat, you’ll find someone plausible. They may have more baggage than you, especially if you are a late bloomer, but lonely people shouldn’t be too picky.
Good read. I sympathize with this a lot. Luckily I was never really bullied (at least to my face) for the most part, but I was definitely ignored & somewhat of an outcast. Luckily I did have friends growing up, but even in the friend groups I was in I was sorta “at the bottom” or just not as close as the others were to each other.
Now approaching 30 I still notice the same things. Personality like that is incredibly hard to change. But I’ve mostly accepted that it’s just who I am. I’m lucky to have a long term girlfriend of over a decade (we’re getting married when she’s done with her residency!), but we’re in a sorta semi-distance situation and I feel like late 20s & early 30s is a hard age to make friends (people already have their groups, they’re focused on marriage, kids, etc). It also doesn’t help that I moved recently. 😅